I went to bed last night feeling very grateful for remembering a tool I hadn't used in a long time. The wonderful gift of it was that it allowed me to consciously create my day. A few years ago I read a book called The Creative Life by Eric Butterworth with a Unity book study group. One of the exercises in that book is "Today I will act as if. . ."
I've been off work for two weeks for the holidays, and went back yesterday. When I woke up at 5:00am to to do some writing and get to work by 7:30am, I was already starting to feel pushed and lacking enough time to do all of the things I want to do. During vacation, I really enjoyed all of the extra time I had, and was starting to feel stressed about how will I fit in all of the things I want to do every day: meditate, write, exercise, cook a simple, healthy dinner, spend time with my husband. It's never easy to balance all of it on top of working all day, for most people. I was starting to feel pretty out-of-sorts about it.
Thankfully, I remembered that I create my reality not by what is happening to me, but by how I am thinking about it. The limits exist only in my thinking. And what I believe dictates how my experience will unfold.
So I wrote in my journal "Today I will act as if I have all of the time and money I need to do all of the things that bring me joy." Just that. I am always awed by how consistently and perfectly conscious choice manifests in my life. Remembering to choose consciously is a prayer, and always answered when asked as all prayers are. The important part is being aware of what our thoughts are praying for. I love the saying that "worry is praying for something you don't want." And as the Buddha said, "As the fletcher whittles and makes straight his arrows, so the master directs his straying thoughts."
Yesterday, I denied the limits of my own making, and chose instead abundant time and resources and joy, by choosing to "act as if." And I watched with gratitude as my day unfolded, catching up with two weeks' worth of referrals, emails and phone calls with ease, doing one thing at a time in perfect order, enjoying the contribution I make in my little corner of the world. And I had time, at lunch, to do my meditation, and after work to write, and walk with my dear husband and share the day, and a simple, healthy dinner.
I acted as if I had all of the time and money I need to do all of the things that bring me joy, and it was so.
So I'll close now and decide on a tool to help me remember, today. . .