Know Thyself

I think that knowing ourselves may be the most important spiritual tool. When we truly know ourselves, there can be no room for doubting our own precious value to the world. As unlimited creators made in the likeness and image of God, we could never be any less than perfect. And in fully accepting this truth, we cannot help but shine brighter in the world, living in awareness of the grace, intelligence and love that we embody.

Our existence provides much room for questioning the perfection of ourselves and our world, but that is as it should be, for we know something much more completely by first experiencing its absence. We are given anger so that we may know forgiveness, pain so that we may know peace, and fear so that we may know faith, and ultimately love. The dichotomies of our world give us divine experience in choosing a higher truth to live by. All is such that we may grow in forgiveness, peace, faith, and love for ourselves.

Know thyself doesn’t mean complete awareness of our own goodness in every moment. I believe that it means knowing just as thoroughly those parts of ourselves that are disconnected from the truth.  The less-than-perfect stuff is harder to get to know, because we tend to push it out of our awareness.  But both the darkness and the light are God within, expressing perfection through the finite, physical form that is us.

God is there, in our resistance to the parts of ourselves that get stuck and forget. God is also there watching our resistance, and knowing its temporary nature, a wave rolling by atop the vast ocean of our eternal selves.

In making friends with both the darkness and the light in our thinking, we find the courage to let go of the small stuff that captures our attention and holds us back. In our loving acceptance of ourselves, ripples of loving acceptance move out into the world, serving the highest good for all.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Don't Take Anything Personally

The second agreement in Don Miguel Ruiz' book, The Four Agreements, which I introduced in a post a few weeks ago, is to never take things personally.  I found the ideas in this book to be simple, and I can very much see the value in them.  None of them are easy to maintain, though.

It is important to remember that what people do really has nothing to do with us.  People come in to their encounters with others with a combination of assumptions, expectations and beliefs about the world that are theirs alone.  Each of us interacts with the world and with each other based on the reality that we see, and for each of us it is different.  That each of us holds a unique perspective is obvious, but I think it is sometimes easy to forget when we don't understand another's motivations.   It's pretty natural to make assumptions based on what we hold true, but that may not be true for the other person at all.

In his book, Ruiz says that, "Nothing other people do is because of you.  It is because of themselves.  All people live in their own dream, in their own mind. . . Even when a situation seems so personal, even if others insult you directly, it has nothing to do with you.  What they say, what they do, and the opinions they give are according to the agreements they have in their own minds.  Their point of view comes from all the programming they received during (their life)."  I can imagine how much misunderstanding could be avoided if people could make this simple, but challenging, agreement with themselves.

He goes on to explain that it is best to not take personally even positive things that people say or do, because those are really not about us, either.  "Whatever people do, feel, think, or say, don't take it personally.  If they tell you how wonderful you are, they are not saying that because of you.  You know you are wonderful."

This really is powerful stuff, couched in simple language.  For me, it is another way to hear my own truth, and create my own outcome as I allow others to create theirs.

Finally, Ruiz says that, "As you make a habit of not taking anything personally, you won't need to place your trust in what others do or say.  You will only need to trust yourself and make responsible choices.  You are never responsible for the actions of others; you are only responsible for you."

For me, this is one of the most important truths.  As unique expressions of God, each of us lives and breathes intelligence beyond measure.  Each of us is choosing our steps along our own perfect path to remembering fully who we are.  They are our steps.  People won't always agree or understand, just as we won't always understand others.  But there is a sacred place for all of life, in its infinitely varied expression, and for its own sake alone.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Seeing Ourselves in Others

I believe that many problems between people could be averted in remembering that others mirror back to us those qualities that we ourselves possess.  We are not able to recognize a favorable attribute in another if it is something that we do not already own ourselves.  This can be a very empowering realization - acknowledging that those people who seem to manifest great things with ease are part of the same creative consciousness that we all embody.

Anything that we admire in another lives in us as well, whether it be the ability to create happiness, peace, joy, healthy relationships, a good job or a shiny new car!  Not only the people we encounter every day, but Jesus, the Buddha, the Dalai Lama, and all of the greatest teachers of the world share with us the very same intelligence that brought our collective existence into being. 

That we possess the same attributes we witness in others also helps us locate the parts of ourselves that are still in darkness.  I remember a teacher at the Aesclepion Healing Institute saying that the people we have the most difficulty with are our biggest teachers.  That was really helpful information at the time, because it caused me to begin searching in my own life to see if it was true.  And I found that it was. 

It’s difficult to accept, in the middle of being very upset with someone else, that they are here to help me learn something valuable about myself that I may have been avoiding.    But if I choose to be completely honest with myself, I realize that what I resist in others is usually something I am resisting acknowledging in myself.  

It might be that we have been needing to practice compassion or forgiveness, or to be less reactive.  Maybe we exhibit the same behavior but haven’t been aware of it.  Or it might be that we’ve been involved in a relationship that we’ve needed to walk away from, but out of fear have stayed longer than is healthy.  

In the perfect and divine order in which we exist, everyone is our teacher - those we might not see as worthy of that honor, and also those who seem so far beyond us that we could never hope to be where they are.  There is no need to hold on to judgment, or envy, because all that we see in others we already possess.  Instead, we are provided with the opportunity to choose what we want to do with the information.

I am always grateful for the teachers who come into my life in countless different ways.  Some I have welcomed, and some have presented lessons that left me kicking and screaming.  But all continue to help me choose how to be the best and highest me.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Peace

We all want peace, between nations, between strangers, and in our close relationships.  We want peace within ourselves especially.  It often seems that if only circumstances outside of us were different, our lives would finally be different, and we could get some peace.  If my family members were all doing well, if the economy weren't such a mess, if there were different politicians running the country, if my kids were grown and out of the house, if my boss (or my spouse) weren't such a lunk-head, if drivers weren't so rude (the list is endless), then I might find a tranquil moment in my life.

But the world we experience is an ongoing reflection of what is taking place within us.  The amount of peace that we are able to find is directly proportional to the nature of our thoughts and beliefs.  Awareness of this truth really can set us free.

If I accept that all I see in the world is mirroring my beliefs, then I can challenge my thoughts and change  my experience.  I exercise my power in designing my reality when I choose to live in peace.  Every less-than-peaceful person or situation I encounter is a perfect teacher, once I get past the resisting and fussing over how the world is not behaving according to my expectations, for me to choose how I want to show up.  At some point, hopefully more sooner than later, I remember to stop and ask myself, have I done or am I doing something similar?  And I try to work on that.  Our interactions with others provide a mirror in which to see the still-learning places in ourselves that we would not necessarily see otherwise.

It is said, as within, so without.  I'm learning that it's never about the other person.   It's always about me, and what I have yet to remember about choosing my best and highest expression of the God within.  I try to be grateful for the events in my life that seem to rob me of my peace, because they provide such perfect opportunities for me to remember that I can at any moment choose the peace that is the truth of me.  I may have been waiting many years, or many lifetimes, to come to just this moment, where I can stand in opposition to another's choices or expression, and then choose instead to forgive us both.  Even when we are expressing less than our highest, we are all heroes.  Our armor may at times get dented and rusty, but it never stops reflecting the light.

Peace stems from the decisions that I make every day about how I label my experiences in the world.  As those decisions nurture peace in my heart, they promote peace in the world as well.  Let there be peace in my heart.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Self-Acceptance

The divine purpose of having our wondrous physical bodies is to know ourselves as unique expressions of God.  In order to expand into our awareness of the truth of our God nature, we must first experience ourselves as less.  Being human is rife with opportunities to forget who we really are.

Throughout life we face situations that challenge our ability to see ourselves as whole and perfect.  We are always striving to "get it right."  The trick is to remember that it's always right, even when it's all messed up.  In all of our struggling and striving, it helps to remember that it is meant to be this way.  Without knowing doubt we would never have the certainty to grow into our best selves.

I was reminded of this today talking with my son, Eric, who is a very talented 20 year-old musician.  He has been feeling alot of joy in expanding his musical abilities, and feeling confident about his path.  About a month ago, he hit a wall.  A few things happened that shook his confidence.  Instead of  feeling joy in his music, he began to doubt his decision to pursue that course of study.  He couldn't stop the voice in his head that kept telling him he wasn't good enough, and actually found himself playing worse than he had in a long time.

He spoke to my husband and me about it, and I like to think that our gentle reminder that the voice is not the truth, and to just acknowledge it and let it go, helped a little.  I know that he didn't really need any advice.  But in the middle of things like that, it's hard to keep our heads up, let alone know ourselves as anything even close to God-like!

My son told us that everyone hits times in their lives when they don't feel good enough.  He wasn't sure exactly how to restore his shaken confidence, but he knew that he would.  He said he was glad it happened early in his life so that he can get past it, and then next time he'll know that he can.  What wisdom from a very capable young man, recognizing the gift in a very unwelcome situation.

I recently bumped into a prayer on self-acceptance, written by Robert and Janet Ellsworth, which spoke to my heart:
"Help me to admit mistakes without feeling shame, and to recognize that they come to teach me.
Help me to find my own voice, to say what I mean and mean what I say.
Help me to see the good and laugh at myself and my life more.
Help me to discover my gifts and honor the uniqueness of others.
Help me to accept who I am, a beloved and special being in Your eyes.
And above all, help me to remain patient and gentle with myself."

I think Eric did a good job of that!

May we all be gentle with ourselves as we compose our life's melodies, and may this tool be a blessing. . .

Looking For the Good

It's a test of faith, or at least a very big stretch, to embrace the idea that there is a positive way to view everything.  I'm not talking about the more everyday things that we by habit react to.  I'm talking about the huge, life-changing, don't-know-if-I-can-make-it-through-this stuff that we all face at times in our lives.  I am a heartfelt believer that all is for good.  But sometimes, when we find ourselves smack dab in the middle of the big things, it's hard to see how.

In my work as a clinical health educator at a large HMO, I don't teach spiritual ideas because that wouldn't be appropriate.  But it's interesting to me how they slip in, because truth is truth.  Teaching the stress management program is one place where I notice that this happens quite a bit.  I mention in that program how our outlook is shaped by how we label things, and the physiological effects of positive thinking.  I touch on the practice of cognitive restructuring, which is really just a clinical term for becoming more aware of what your automatic thoughts are and choosing to replace negative ones with more productive ones.  And as I've noticed time and time again in classes, choosing to look for the good can work for people who are experiencing an overload of normal daily stressors. 

But what about handling the real crises, such as loss of livelihood, marital separation, or illness or death of a loved one?  Can we somehow find good in that?  In my own life, when I've hit those times, I most definitely have not been able to see anything positive about what was happening.  But looking back, I realize that I was able to accept that I would get through, and some day be able to recognize the gift in the experience.  Maybe even when we can't find the good in the moment, we can look instead for that place of knowing that the best and highest is taking place, even if we can't see how just then.  I got through one very difficult point in my life quite a few years back, with the very frequent prayer, "Let the best happen for all of us."  At the time I didn't know how it could, but it did.

I love the Unity belief that everything that happens to us is an answer to a prayer.  Everything.  All that we call to ourselves is an answered prayer, or will help us release something that keeps us from manifesting a prayer.  In either case, our heart's desire can never be thwarted.  The soul's purpose is to always be moving us to the light.

In the worst of times, loss of a job can mean finding inner resources or outward support that we never dreamed existed.  The separation of a couple can mean an opportunity to recreate a more joyful and healthy relationship, or to move beyond one that no longer serves both people's highest expression.  And love never dies, but changes, and then finds itself again.

In every moment of our lives, the perfection that we embody is working to illuminate our path.  All we need do is trust that it is there for us.  When we look for the good in what we experience, we affirm the limitless creative power of the God within.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Forgiving

I woke up from an interesting dream this morning.  I dreamed that I was with a group of people and we were writing a story together.  It was being recorded on paper, for some reason 14 lines per page.  Someone suggested that the next thing in the story be to forgive.  I didn't feel that forgiving should be written into the story at that point, without any context explaining it being there.  People were talking amongst themselves, and I said something like, "In order to forgive, we need to have had someone do something that was not in our best interest, and then we need to remember that they are worthy of a place in our heart, and then we can create a space to forgive."  Everyone stopped talking and started taking notes, and I woke up.  

I've writtten about forgiveness before.  One of the things this dream reminded me of was to take note of  the quiet truth of my heart, rather than the much louder promptings of my thinking.  Another thing that the dream caused me to remember is that I call people into my life in order to experience forgiving, or anything else.  As with everything, even those situations where people don't have my best interest at heart, are called forth by me, to create the opportunity for me to choose how I want to show up. I could never know myself as forgiving if I'd never had a reason to forgive.  I could never really know peace if I'd never known chaos.  And so it goes.

I also realized that there are layers of forgiving.  I can decide to forgive, and feel like I have, but then suddenly feel hurt or angry over what I thought I'd forgiven.  In order to really release something, I must first look directly at it, be honest with myself about why I am being so affected by it, and feel my feelings about it.  It doesn't help to avoid the very situations I've called to myself in order to grow.

I am struck often by the grace that allows us the ability to choose what expressing ourselves as God actually looks like.  Over and over throughout time, we decide.  Every situation is an opportunity to choose who we are, and who we want to be.  We are gifts to each other in our awakening.

I came away from that dream renewed by the peace that comes from knowing that the best interest of my soul could never be thwarted.  And I am again grateful for the gifts I have been given, in their many and varied packages.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Loving the Body

I realized in beginning to write about validating the amazing miracle of our bodies, that one post wouldn't be nearly enough!  I'll begin with some thoughts today, and add more at a later time.

These wonderful vehicles that our souls have created to have their human experience are worthy beyond measure.  Our society is so body conscious, but in a way that actually harms the relationship that the soul has with the body.  We are taught to focus on the body as a way to conform to the norm, and to judge our value based on its size and shape.  We all know that the incredible expectation for our bodies to fit within a narrow range of appearance is unrealistic and unhealthy, but most of us are driven to conform to that expectation nevertheless.  It's amazing how powerful that influence is on us.

When we are trying to fit a mold, communication between spirit and body is diminished.  Spirit becomes much less able to hear the messages that the body is sending out, and the body becomes unable to hear the soul's validation of its creation.  I believe that learning to listen to the body is a lifelong process, and not something that we always do easily.  We need to be present to hear our body's gentle messages.  With our thoughts in the past or in the future, we will not be aware of our bodies at all.  When our minds are very busy, we usually take our bodies for granted.

There are many downsides to taking the body for granted.  One very big disadvantage is that when we are not present and choosing to sense and feel what is happening in the body, we miss so much of the delicious experience of living.  Some of those feelings are wonderful beyond words, and some are very difficult, but they all create the depth and texture of our experience.

We are not present when we are caught up in thought.  I really believe that thinking is overrated!  We think too much.  We could accomplish just as much, probably more, if we consciously chose to review data, make decisions, and then put thinking aside and experience!  There are for me no moments in my life more exquisite than the ones spent squarely in the present, using my senses, feeling my emotions, aware of my body's being.

We are also much better able to care for ourselves when we pay attention to our body's needs.  In our performance-driven world, it becomes easy to focus on completing tasks and completely ignore our bodies' gentle urgings.  If we do that for too long, our bodies may need a more forceful way to communicate, which sometimes happens though illness.  Our bodies always let us know what they need, we have only to listen.

If we take the time to allow the gentle communion between body and spirit to take place, we find truth.  In hearing the soul's infinite regard, the body knows its own sacred nature and is healed.  Without that space, our bodies are disconnected from the truth and we feel invalidated.

Creating a space for body and spirit to connect can happen in many different ways.  It can be something we choose to do quickly, or a practice that we dedicated more time to.  A really simple way to find connection with the body is to breathe, consciously and into the body.  Breathing grounds our awareness into the body.  Another thing I will practice is to consciously pull all of my energy into my body, so that none of my awareness is spilling out, and I am aware of the physical space that I occupy.  (I will write more about being in the body in another blog.)  Another thing I have done, when I notice that I am caught up in some judgment of my body, is to just quiet my mind for a moment and ask my spirit it's opinion.  This is a great tool!  There is no media-driven demand for thinness strong enough to budge my spirit's infinite love of my body, just as it is, in all of its perfect ability to walk me though the days of my life, as a light-filled expression of God.

When you find yourself having a hard time appreciating your body, remember that that opinion does not originate with you, and then let your body listen to the eloquent wisdom of your soul.  Love is there.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Dignity

I have been thinking lately about dignity. There are so many things in this life that are antithetical to living in dignity; discrimination or abuse in our current situation, or limiting beliefs about ourselves that we've accepted from somewhere in the past. We can think of countless examples of circumstances that rob people of their self-respect. In some ways self-respect is very hard to maintain, especially when we are taught to hold ourselves up to so many different guideposts about what it means to be whole and healthy. Comparing ourselves to others, we can never be enough. But as with all things, divine purpose is providing us with the opportunity to remember who we really are.

As children of God, we can revel in the glory of our own existence. Being born to this earth is the only credential we need to be part of the kingdom. I notice that when I choose to express my dignity, when in my interactions I consciously come from a place of acknowledging first my own intrinsic worthiness, I cannot help but recognize in all other people that same measure of immense value. I did not always know that I needed to focus within first, but I am remembering. In owning the truth about myself, I see the truth in others.

When I am living in my own glory, the world feels like a very magical place. I am here, in the middle of limitless possibility, and all is for good. Everyone I meet is an angel, doing their own perfect dance.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Compassion

Compassion is an immensely powerful spiritual tool. I believe we could change the world with more attention on choosing compassion. Developing an understanding of what compassion really means has been a very personal journey for me. I remember a teacher at the Aesclepion Healing Institute telling me that I have more than my share of compassion. It's been one of my life's most valuable learning experiences, because in the family I grew up in, being sensitive and compassionate was seen as weakness, and was not validated. I always felt very wrong and out of place. It provided me with a very challenging but ultimately perfect opportunity to look deep within myself and choose exactly who I want to be.

As the Vietnamese Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hahn, wrote: "If you think that compassion is passive, weak, or cowardly, then you don't know what real compassion or understanding is. If you think that compassionate people do not resist and challenge injustice, you are wrong. They are warriors, heroes, and heroines who have gained many victories. When you act with compassion, with nonviolence. . . you have to be very strong. You no longer act out of anger, you do not punish or blame. Compassion grows constantly inside of you, and you can succeed in your fight against injustice. Mahatma Gandhi was just one person. He did not have any bombs, any guns, or any political party. He acted simply on the. . . strength of compassion. . ."

Deciding on compassion toward another allows healing to happen. It allows ruffled feathers to settle, stirred-up emotions to quiet, and understanding and communication to begin. Compassion can right many wrongs. Certainly things happen in life that we are justified in feeling anger or resentment about, and we need to feel those things. We need to look closely at those situations in order to learn and grow. At some point, though, we need to get to that place that acknowledges God expressing as each of us. We are all on a path of remembering. We all have bad days, and we all wear blinders around certain situations. The truth is, everyone is doing the best they can with what they have in any given moment. It does no good for us personally or for our human evolution to hold on to judgement.

I learned awhile back that the thing I dislike most in someone else is the thing I most resist acknowledging in myself; a bitter pill to swallow, indeed. That other person is a perfect book to read, to learn about myself, if I choose to put that energy of judgement to its best use. I think it's well said in John 8:7, "He that is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone."

When I am in judgment of others, and I hold on instead of feeling it and then letting it go, I open the door for that energy to grow in my life. Peace and balance become elusive, as I find more to judge in myself as well as in others. Like forgiveness, compassion is not something we do only for the other person, but very much for ourselves as well.

We cannot solve a problem by being in the same energy that created the problem. We have to take a step up. Raising our vibration to one of compassion in a situation allows divine order to design a perfect resolution benefitting everyone.

A friend this morning told me about a quote that she uses from her 12-step program, which I plan to use often. It's simple, and a great way to remember the power of compassion: "Bless them, change me."

May this tool be a blessing. . .

More Gratitude!

My mom asked me to write more on the topic of gratitude, and I am happy to do that, because it is my favorite practice. She specifically mentioned something that I have taped on my refrigerator, which some of you may have seen. I'm not looking at it right now, so I'll have to paraphrase: "I am grateful for the chores that need doing; it means that I have a home. I am grateful for the piles of laundry that I never seem to finish; it means that my loved ones are close by. I am grateful for the big heating bills; it means that I get to be warm. I am grateful for the parking spot that I find at the far end of the lot; it means that I am healthy enough to walk." There are quite a few more.

I love this! Mom must have, too, because she remembered it from the last time she visited. So much of the reality that we experience is dictated by the way we choose to think about what is happening to us. I would even go further to say that it's not the situation, but how we label the situation, that gives rise to how we feel, how we react, and how we ultimately perceive our experience. It's not so much about noticing and being grateful for the big, in-your-face things that happen, although that's important, too. It's more about recognizing the small things that grace us quietly and often go unnoticed.

We manifest in our lives that which we put the most attention on. Beginning to become more aware of how we label situations gives us many opportunities to choose to focus on the good. As human beings, we tend to find what we're looking for. We get what we expect. If my big heating bill causes me to lament over greedy utility companies and dishonest political practices, I validate greed and dishonesty. The more I validate them, the more I will find. I'm not saying that these things don't exist in our world, but it doesn't really help to dwell on them. If there is something that needs changing in our world and we feel compelled to act toward that change, we are proactively working for good. If we do not feel compelled to act, we can let it go and focus our attention on some other good.

I always thought it would be a wonderful idea to create a news network, maybe just starting locally, that reported only positive news, acts of kindness, milestones, all of the phenomenal things that people do every day that usually go unnoticed. What if we validated these things? This probably sounds very pollyanna-ish to some, but what might happen if there was a channel we could tune in to that acknowledged all of the good that happens in the world? It might help move our collective reality from one of fear to one of trust, and love. It's all in what we choose to focus on. I think this is a great idea, and if someone wants to take it and run with it, I would be grateful! If it's already happening somewhere, please let me know because I want to support it.

How miraculous, this game of life! I am struck sometimes by the unspeakable beauty and perfection of it. If we remembered always that each thought, each word is designing our future, individually and collectively, we would be so much more mindful of what we are choosing to express. We would be so much more deliberate about what we hold true in any given moment.

Like happiness, we can cultivate gratitude. We can choose to have eyes that seek the good in things big and small. Choosing to live in gratitude is how we create heaven on earth.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Casting the Burden

Casting the burden is a very gentle but potent tool that I learned years ago when reading some of the writings of Florence Scovel Shinn. Shinn was a new thought spiritual teacher and metaphysical writer born in 1871. She published The Game of Life and How to Play It in 1925, Your Word is Your Wand in 1928 and The Secret Door of Success in 1940. I was amazed reading her books how very ahead of her time she was. She was one of the pioneers in our understanding that what we think and hold true, we manifest in our lives.

She was a great believer in affirmations, affirmed what she choose to be true about her reality, and encouraged others to do the same. One affirmation that I have used throughout the years, and that I needed in particular today, was "I cast this burden to the Christ within and I go free."

I had a bad day at work. People were grumpy and mean-spirited. I tried very hard to keep my mood separate from what was going on around me, but by the end of the day I was feeling pretty beat up. I forgot all of my tools. I got completely sucked in and it didn't feel very good. When I got home I sat down to do my meditation, but was feeling kind of antsy. I had absorbed so much of the conflict energy that I couldn't settle down. My mind was racing. I was frustrated because I knew that I needed to take some time to release the stuff I'd picked up that was not me, but I couldn't even decide what to do. (I trust I'm painting a clear picture of how keyed up I was, and how very much I wanted not to be!)

When I finally let go and stopped trying, and said to myself, "I don't know what to do to," I instantly remembered Florence Scovel Shinn's affirmation, "I cast this burden to the Christ within and I go free". The acknowledgement of that inner wisdom recreated my perspective, in an inkling, to one of truth. No situation I encounter could ever be more powerful than the truth that God lives in me and as me, and in any situation, I can choose how I view my experience. I can dwell on it and suffer over it, or I can let it go and focus on other, more positive things. The Christ within me, who knows herself as one with God and the sole creator of her perception, can decide at any point to be free of any burden, and it is done.

Shinn was a great teacher of truth. I look forward to writing more about her teachings in this blog.

Thank you, God!

Happiness

I came across a wonderful quote today by a man named Denis Waitley that started me thinking about cultivating happiness: "Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude. " How true.

Many people use benchmarks outside of themselves to decide whether they can claim happiness. Is my partner meeting my needs, is my job validating my abilities, do I have what my peers have, or more? These markers for happiness are fleeting and don't fulfill us on a deep level.

That's not to say that we need to adopt a life of poverty and isolation to be happy. It seems that many believe that creating material things is shallow and meaningless, or in some way against our spiritual nature. Material things don't provide lasting happiness, but provide myriad ways for us to express ourselves as divine creators. Expressing my birthright as a creator in God's image does make me happy! I believe that God wishes for us all of the good things that will help us relish a complete and full life.

Although material things can't create lasting happiness, they are not contrary to expressing the highest in ourselves. The difference is our intention. Are we working to buy a bigger home because it's expected, or because it would be a healthy and peaceful place for our growing family? Are we working nights to get through school because someone expects us to do something more with our lives, or because we are drawn to a new career as a way of expressing more of our true talents in the world? Are we saving money for a special vacation because we're trying to keep up with someone else, or as a way to connect lovingly with our partner, experience joy and more of the wonderful places and people on this planet? We are meant to experience all that we want to do, be and have as expressions of the highest within us.

If material things can't provide lasting happiness, what does? Can we cultivate happiness, consciously, as a practice? I believe we can. The beautiful quote above provides good insight. Happiness is a spiritual experience wherein we are present in our moments with these three things: love, grace and gratitude. Having our moments in love is allowing others their path as we walk our own, and remembering that each of us is uniquely expressing the God within. Having our moments in grace is having an awareness of ourselves and others as being worthy of God's highest favor. Having our moments in gratitude means simply acknowledging the tremendous gift in all of it. As complicated as life gets, these three things we can do.

True and lasting happiness comes when we accept the truth of who we are, and are glad of it. When we know ourselves, God rejoices!

Forgiveness

Forgiving is something very simple in theory but difficult in practice. I understand that we're all finding our paths to the God within in our own unique, often stumbling ways. I know that we are all perfect in the process of remembering who we are. Much of the time, I can even consciously acknowledge the spirit of God within the people who I encounter.

I have a limitless ability to forgive, but that doesn't mean I always do it. Fear gets me stuck in needing to blame or to hold someone in a less than Godlike view. I need them to be a certain way, because I fear that if they aren't, somehow I will lose, something will be taken from me or I will be hurt, or somehow less. I know in my heart this is not true, but in that reactive moment it feels true. It usually has nothing really to do with the situation at hand, but more with reminding me of something from my past that I haven't yet come to terms with. Those memories can have alot of emotional charge.

Forgiving may not be easy much of the time, but it's an important part of our spiritual nature. When we condemn others in our thinking, even over little things, we perpetuate negativity in our awareness, and it can affect our outlook and physical health. It also robs us of our joy. Blaming takes alot of life force that I'd like to use for other, more delightful things.

Edwene Gaines talks wonderfully about forgiveness in her book "The Four Spiritual Laws of Prosperity." In the chapter, The Mysterious Power of Forgiveness, she states that "harboring a grudge completely blocks our ability to have peace of mind. . . An unwillingness to forgive is like stabbing ourselves with a knife and expecting the person who did us wrong to feel the pain. Forgiveness is not something we do for the sake of another person. Forgiveness is something we do for ourselves." Before I read her book, I hadn't considered the connection between prosperity and forgiveness.

I've enjoyed practicing one of Edwene's tools about forgiving, which is to try to spend an entire day without holding on to a single negative thought about anyone. It's harder than it sounds, and certainly makes it clear how often the mind rushes to judgement. I noticed in practicing this tool what a great space it is, choosing to instantly release each negative thought as it comes up and not dwell on it. In doing so, I create a world of my own making.

I learned another simple forgiveness tool from Roland at Unity. A group was discussing forgiveness, and he said "I just see them in the light." Wow. That means that in a twinkling we can see the truth of someone as the light of God, even if they have just done something that ticks us off. And the great thing is, it works!

I really love how the light of truth graces our humanness in so many simple, small ways.

May this tool be a blessing. . .