Tuesday, April 26, 2011
I haven’t written in a few weeks, and I have missed it. After some suggestions from friends, I took a short break to begin the process of turning Daily Spiritual Tools into a book. I’m excited by the prospect of having these tools in one physical place where a person can actually flip through the pages of something solid. Wish me luck!
I discovered a new tool a few weeks ago, when I was feeling very cranky. I think all of us go through times when nothing seems right, and it was my time. I was feeling worn out in my job and out-of-sorts in my relationships. I felt like I was struggling with the same old things that I’ve struggled with for years, and not getting anywhere. It was a pretty depressing state of mind.
I know that what I think is not always the truth, and I’m learning to loosen my attachment to the thoughts going by in my mind. Still, sometimes they take on a life of their own, grab me and take me down a very unhelpful road.
I sat down in my favorite spot to meditate, with the intention of settling myself and finding my way back to the truth. At first, I just sat and let myself hear the pessimistic dialog that was taking place in my head. In that moment, everything was a problem. Nothing was right with my life, or with me. So I sat there, reminding myself to just notice what I was thinking and feeling without trying to talk myself out of it.
As I focused my attention on the thoughts and feelings that were moving through me, I noticed how my grumpy thoughts were feeding the jangling emotions, and the emotions in turn were continuing the negative thinking. What a vicious cycle. Somebody, stop me!
Thank Goodness for awareness, for as I continued to focus my attention on where I was without trying to change anything, a thought came to me in the form of a question, which was “If my life is an expression of God, if this is really God in the middle of these thoughts and feelings, what does God think about living as Sherry?”
God laughed, a big belly-laugh of delight, and I experienced again the miracle that comes every time the light of truth finds a new way to shine on me, and to remind me of who I am, and who we all are.
I knew in that moment an all-encompassing love that I truly have no words for, and I felt God’s joy in every single thing that goes along with being me. I was reminded of the unfathomable depth of love that created this existence, and guides and supports us throughout every breath we take. We are perfection in every moment, in every thought we have and every emotion we feel, and in every single experience we have.
To remember this always (or at least as often as possible), and to help others remember it too. . .That is my quest!
May you see yourself through the eyes of God within you, and may this tool be a blessing. . .